Alexandra Levit's Water Cooler Wisdom

How to Be an Effective Spy

Increasingly, managers and recruiters are being encouraged to assess cultural fit during the hiring process in order to ensure that candidates will assimilate well.

If you’re a job seeker, though, there are things you can do to determine whether you are a good match and help the company out. After all, it's just as important for you as it is for them; you will not be satisfied or productive in an environment that doesn’t support your values and vice versa.

The best way to do this is to spy...but how?  Check out my post at the AMEX OPEN Forum for the particulars.

Being an Introvert in an Extrovert's World

Sherrie Haynie, a consultant with CPP, Inc., the publisher of the Myers-Briggs assessment, had this to say regarding introverts:

“Often, introverts describe how they interact with the outside world as a performance, and acting is work.  Similar to professional actors, introverts may appear enthusiastic, lively and entertaining.  However, many describe the experience as being ‘on stage’ – for an introvert to spend a significant amount of their day using non-preferred characteristics requires a great deal of energy.”

Wow.  I couldn’t have said it better myself, and I am, in fact, one of those introverts.

Eva Rykrsmith wrote a great piece on how introverts can be more effective at work.  For some other thoughts on how introverts can manage the stress of a role that requires extroverted behaviors, have a look at my post on Intuit's Quickbase blog.

 

A Manager's Guide to Mentoring

I swear by mentoring as one of the best ways to teach your team members what they need to know to be productive and send the message that you think they’re important and care about their growth. Obviously, an official mentoring program is great to have, but what if your company hasn’t gone down this road before? 

The Mentoring Group says that before implementing a formal initiative, you should consider how much support mentoring has from executives and employees, the time and resources people have to spend, and the overall health of the organization.

For other preparation and execution musts, check out my post on Intuit's Quickbase blog.

The 5 Most Awkward Conversations at Work

1. You asked your co-worker if she was pregnant, and she's not.
2. You asked your boss of eight years if he enjoyed his Christmas, and he had to remind you that he's Jewish.
3. Your co-worker is a touchy-feely type, and you just admitted it makes you uncomfortable.
4. A colleague just remarked on an unsavory habit of yours - like the fact that you bite your nails.
5. After going on about how much you dislike a new hire, your colleague informs you he's her cousin.

Okay, so maybe these aren't THE most awkward conversations, but they are certainly good examples.  In fact, I am certain there is no shortage of truly awkward moments that could occur at the office.  In order to make them less excruciating, here are some suggestions.

If Someone Made an Awkward Comment to You

Rather than acting offended or taken aback, keep your cool and be as gracious as possible.  Say something simple like "thanks for letting me know," or even something moderately tongue-and-cheek, like "thanks for sharing."  Then, proceed to change the subject and converse as if the awkward comment never happened.  Recognize that the other person is probably still uncomfortable, sol do your best to engage him or her in a discussion by asking questions and demonstrating body language that shows there are no hard feelings.

If You Made the Awkward Comment

Instead of standing there like you were the victim of a stun gun, make light of the moment in order to put both of you at ease.  My go-to phrase in this situation is, "well, that was awkward."  Smile and turn the conversation in a positive direction.  For example, in the case of the non-pregnant co-worker, you might say, "I guess you must be glowing for another reason.  What skin care regimen do you use?  I might have to try it."

Now more than ever, it's important to be mentally present for the person.  Don't let yourself get distracted by technology or other people during the conversation, and genuinely listen to what she's saying.  The more involved and attentive you are, the less likely you are to find yourself in the middle of another uncomfortable moment.

This post was originally published on Intuit's Quickbase blog.

 

Can Your Boss Count on You?

You know what I've realized in my tenure as a manager? The number one quality I appreciate most in a direct report is reliability.  By reliable, I mean a person who says she is going to do something, and then actually does it in the agreed-upon manner.

You’d think this one would be kind of a no brainer for employees, especially when it comes to the boss who hands out the paychecks. But time and time again, in both my personal and professional life, I come across people who nod and smile when I ask them to help out with something, make promises they never intend to keep, or volunteer to assist with projects because it makes them look good.

As a result, I develop the dangerous expectation that I can stop worrying about that particular aspect of the project, that I can count on this person to take care of it. And imagine how disheartened I am when the deadline approaches (or worse, passes), and I either have to nag my report to complete the task and put it back on my own plate. I’ve fallen victim to my mother’s old warning: “if you let someone else’s lack of planning become your emergency, you’re a fool.”

A lot of the time, people who don’t keep their word aren’t doing it maliciously. They fully intend to get the task done, but they forget, get distracted with something else, or keep telling themselves they’ll get to it eventually. Nevertheless, it’s exactly these types of situations that make me a manager who delegates reluctantly. I know that if a project is in my hands, I can control how and when it gets done.  But if I have to trust another person, it’s a different situation entirely.

I know that I’m not alone in this. If you want to be the kind of employee bosses love, do your job without being prodded, and once you agree to a task, don’t let it slide. Always meet your deadlines, and if something comes up that makes that impossible, give your manager plenty of heads up. Never underestimate the importance of being the person who brings peace of mind to the team, the person who makes it possible for the boss to ask once and then walk away confidently, knowing that the task in good, capable hands.

Premature Escalation?

A few years ago, I was finishing up a project at the agency where I worked part time. My colleague and I had been working closely with another internal team on this initiative for a while and fortunately, things were going relatively smoothly.

As the vice president overseeing the project, I always tried to be responsive to the internal team’s needs, knowing that they represented the best interests of the client. My colleague and I talked to members of this team at least every other day, and sometimes multiple times in one day. They had my cell phone number.  If I was not in the office, they knew where to find me.

Just after we launched the initiative, the vice president on the other internal team discovered that something was wrong.  Normally, he or someone on his team would have called my colleague or me on our cell phones. Instead, he called my boss.

It was my role on projects like this to provide my boss with information on a “need to know” basis. He was unprepared for a call like this and caught off guard, and understandably reacted with a bit of panic. I was fortunate that I didn’t get in trouble, because my boss trusted me and wasn't quick to place blame just because someone expressed displeasure.

I hate corporate hierarchies as much as the next person, but it burned me that someone I’d been working with blatantly went over my head.  My friend calls the phenomena “premature escalation” – referring to the fact that those who use it don’t even give the rightful people they’re working with a chance to respond appropriately.

In my opinion, you should reserve going to someone’s boss for cases in which that someone is not giving you what you need, and has been forewarned. Even then, you should be careful.  Behavior like this is not going to endear you to your co-workers, so you should make sure it’s necessary and that you have no other choice.

Pathological Lying at Work

I just called a colleague to ask him to participate in a third-party project I was working on.  I wanted him to join so that I‘d have an excuse to spend more time with him, and I found myself saying all sorts of things to get him to agree.  For example, the project wouldn’t require any time at all, and that it was the most meaningful initiative I’d worked on in years.

Some of my comments were half-truths, and some were pretty close to being outright lies.

Why We Tiptoe Around the Truth

I consider myself to be a pretty moral person, so it bothers me that I’m not always honest with co-workers.  It’s the worst when someone asks me my opinion and I don’t want to hurt her feelings.  Why can’t I just be straight with people?

According to Peter Bregman in his blog post for Psychology Today, the answer is that I don’t want to feel mean or rude, and don’t want the person I’m talking to disapprove of me for being mean or rude.  By lying to preserve someone’s feelings, I’m the one who feels better.

Lying Doesn’t Work

Subtly positioning things so they appear in a better light and massaging the truth to make it more likely to be embraced also makes me feel better too.  It also takes an exceptional amount of energy and apparently fools know one.

But even understanding that, I'm still one of Bregman's minions.  I still try to make things seem different than they are because it takes courage to be honest. I have to be willing to be vulnerable, and I’m not great at that.

Bregman says that honesty is much more compelling, powerful, and effective than the alternative. People want the truth.  They are willing to accept it far more often than we think, and respect other people and organizations for speaking it.  Truly honest people make it easier for others to identify with them, trust them, and ultimately value them as leaders.

This post was originally published on Intuit's Quickbase blog.

 

4 Reasons Why Social Media Use = Great Customer Service

If you’ve bought anything in the last few years, you’ve no doubt noticed that customer service is not what it used to be.  Most of us don’t dare pick up the phone because we fear hearing that dreaded phrase:

“To hear a menu of options, please press 1.”

Now, however, some companies are finally getting it right, and their training ground has been none other than the prolific world of social media.  On her Perspectives blog, Mila Araujo provides these four reasons why companies that invest in social media achieve better customer service:

Social Media Requires High Engagement

Companies that have committed themselves to social media listen to what their customers are saying and the buzz around the web that’s related to the company, and they respond in real time.  Because they are routinely engaging their audience one-on-one already, they are more likely to provide excellent service.

Social Media Requires Adaptation

In order to do well in social media, you have to be dynamic, motivated, and nimble.  You have to be able to change quickly in order to use social media channels to deliver products and services more effectively.  Companies who live in this mindset require employees who do as well.

Social Media Tools Use Public Conversation Forums

The fact that everyone can see what you are doing and how you are responding to an issue creates a higher standard overall.  Companies that use social media are confident in their approaches and are trained to respond so they can offer a high level of consistent performance. On the other hand, the nature of social media allows for quick identification of less desirable behaviors that must be corrected quickly.

Social Media Enables Viral Behavior

Anyone using social media knows that bad press can easily go viral, and it doesn’t have to be by way of a major news story.  All it takes is one person to make a negative comment and others may join the discussion. This kind of viral spread ensures that social media-minded companies pay special attention to operations so an online PR disaster doesn’t occur.

This post was originally published on Intuit's Quickbase blog. 

Watch Your Mouth: Office Gossip and Other No-Nos

Whenever you hear something juicy about a colleague, whether it is related to work or not, you have the immediate impulse to share it across the hall.  Why?

Frank T. McAndrew is a professor at Knox College in Illinois who has devoted part of his research on evolutionary psychology to the study of gossip.

Apparently, humans have an almost irresistible desire to talk about people who are not present. McAndrew believes that in the ancient past, gossip served a useful social function in bonding group members together. At a time when humans lived in small bands and meeting strangers was a rare occurrence, gossip helped us survive and thrive.  Thus, it appears that we are hardwired to be fascinated by gossip.

McAndrew’s research, as described in Scientific American, showed that we're keen to hear and pass along any bad news about our rivals or any good news about our friends.  Men are more likely to share gossip with their romantic partners, while women will whisper with their lovers and their friends alike.  Both men and women prefer talking about and hearing about people of their own gender.

Watch Your Whispers

Despite the genetic predisposition, however, it’s a good idea to censor yourself in the workplace.  Dishing the dirt at work is obviously fun, especially if you’re bored.  Listen all you want, but refrain from contributing to conversations that could compromise someone’s reputation.  Damaging stories spread like a conflagration, and being nailed as the source can be a career killer.  If someone shares a tasty tidbit, simply nod and smile.

Watch Your Language

Also, don’t swear at work. Nothing taints your professional reputation as much as foul language. There are people all over the business world who spew curse words, and maybe your boss is one of them. If you’re tempted to join in, remember where the phrase “potty mouth” came from. At work, you don’t want to look or smell like you were anywhere near the potty, so don’t sound like it either.

Watch Your Topics

When it comes to work conversation topics in general, talking about whatever comes to mind may not necessarily be appreciated, and could earn you a label you don’t want. I suggest avoiding any discussion involving sex, drugs, or politics, because even if you are sure all of your co-workers are on the same page as you, you’re probably wrong about someone.

According to Anthony Balderrama’s CareerBuilder.com article, 13 Things to Keep to Yourself at Work, other conversation topics to steer clear of at work include:

•  Your medical history
• Your religion
• Your life of privilege and how you spend your abundance of money
• Your emotional issues and/or therapy sessions
• Your compensation details or other confidential HR issues
• Your job search or future work plans
• Your personal life

Even seemingly inoffensive topics can actually get you into trouble, so before you open your mouth, think about whether the listener really needs to hear what you’re about to say, and how he will react to it.

Here’s a story that took me by surprise when I heard it.  John Olson was an assistant manager at Publix Supermarkets in Florida, a workplace filled with golf-playing fanatics.  John, on the other hand, preferred to spend his time off in more adventurous pursuits.  Once, he took an airboat into the Everglades and spent the afternoon wrestling alligators.  When John bragged about it to his manager, the boss flew into a breathless rant about how John was an irresponsible manager and was setting a poor example for his hourly employees.  So, you never know.

In short, while you certainly don’t have to walk around the office bound and gagged, you should always ask yourself, “is this TMI (too much information)?” before sharing it.

This post was originally published on Intuit's Quickbase blog.

 

7 Traits of Stellar Project Managers

Many of us manage large projects on a regular basis.  No doubt this is one of the more complex and stressful aspects of our jobs, so I’ve asked some of the best PMs I know about the traits that are essential to their success.  According to my sources, great PMs:

Possess unofficial authority

Often, the best PMs do not have formal authority over those working on their teams.  Instead, their natural charisma and infectious enthusiasm motivates people to follow and listen to them, and helps them develop an organization-wide reputation as a popular leader.

Are networking stars

The best PMs understand who they need to go to to get things done, and they develop strong relationships with those individuals so that cross-functional projects run more smoothly.  Also, should the project run into a snag, great PMs can rely on their network to find and implement a workaround.

Communicate constantly

A project cannot succeed without a PM who seeks and listens to the advice of experienced partners, and then puts processes in place for soliciting feedback on a regular basis.  They are clear in what needs to be done, by whom, and by what deadline, and they intuitively understand the questions to ask to ensure a project is moving in the right direction.

Have an obsessive attention to detail

When you’re leading a large project with thousands of components, it’s easy for small but critical pieces to get lost in the shuffle.  The best PMs use technology and frequent team communication to keep track of these details so that red flags are dealt with immediately – before they become deal-breaking issues.

Understand the big picture

At the same time, though, talented PMs can pick the areas to focus on by always keeping the end result in mind.  They align the goals of the project with the overall goals of the organization, and if a project element doesn’t further the big picture or impact the project in a significant way, it can be tossed out or at least back-burnered in favor of more pressing concerns.

Have a thick skin

In order to be able to sustain a complicated effort that places stress on all parties, PMs must be able to let harsh criticism roll off them.  They are able to take the brunt of the fallout when a client or higher-up is upset about a delay, and put themselves in the line of fire if the project does not deliver in some way.  They keep their cool and view failures as intriguing challenges rather than soul-crushing setbacks.  They can make decisions quickly, without worrying about what every individual on the team is going to think.

Are amateur psychologists

Great PMs are able to read between the lines when team members aren’t getting along, or when someone is underperforming.  They are able to effectively manage the expectations of internal and external stakeholders by intuitively understanding what’s important to each person.  They speak to others empathetically – as fellow human beings – and diplomatically resolve conflicts when they occur.

This post was originally published on Intuit's Quickbase blog.