Alexandra Levit's Water Cooler Wisdom

The Older You Are, the Less Stress You Have?

A friend who is in the Communications department at the American Psychological Association kindly provided me with the just-released results of their Stress in America survey, broken down by generations.  As soon as I read it, I was itching to share the key findings with you: 

 

The Stress in America survey was conducted online by Harris Interactive among 1791 adults who reside in the U.S., which included 406 Millennials (18-29 year olds), 478 Gen Xers (30-43 year olds), 651 Boomers (44-62 year olds), and 256 Matures (63 years and older).

 

So what did they find?  Well first of all, as adults grow older they report having less stress and managing the stress they do have extremely well.  83% of Matures report a stress level below the extreme level while one-third of younger generations report extreme average stress levels of 8, 9, or 10 on a 10-point scale.   Roughly half of younger adults feel the amount of stress they experience has increased over the past year while 7 in 10 Matures feel their amount of stress has stayed the same or decreased. 

 

 

As it relates to the workplace, satisfaction with their employment appears fairly similar across age groups. Across generations, employees are satisfied with the way employers recognize employee contribution.  Employees in the Mature age group are most likely to say they are satisfied with the types of employee involvement initiatives and opportunities for growth and development that are offered.  On the other hand, employed Gen Xers are most likely to say they would recommend their workplace to others.   Despite these findings, employed Millennials are more likely than Boomers and Matures to say they intend to seek other employment next year.

 

Employees, across generations, face similar challenges at work, with slight variations.  Top stressors for employed Millennials are low salaries, long hours, unrealistic expectations, and work interfering with personal time.   Top stressors for employed Gen Xers and Boomers are low salaries, lack of opportunity for growth, and too heavy a workload.  Top stressors for employed Matures are physical illnesses and ailments, low salaries, and uncertain or undefined job expectations.

 

 

What was most interesting to me is that a whole lot of people in all generations cited the economy as a main source of stress, and this was before the latest crash. 

Don't Bite the Hand That Feeds You

Marketing guru Seth Godin read my mind.  As he says in a recent post:

“I don't know about you, but I'm getting plenty of emails asking for more money for various political campaigns.  That's because the systems in place are good at asking for money, and that's what they measure. They're willing to burn out permission, person by person, just to squeeze out the last few bucks.  What a shame. What a waste.  Businesses do this all the time. So do non-profits. They get in a habit of doing one thing (pay, pay, pay!) and they forget that this has a real cost. Ask enough times and people will shut you out. And once they shut you out, you're out forever.”

I too have gotten a ridiculous amount of calls and e-mails this season from everyone I have supported in the past, from local animal charities to U.S. presidential campaigns.  Because it was my 10 year college reunion, somehow my alma mater felt it was appropriate to call at dinnertime every night for a week straight. In case these guys haven’t noticed, the economy is really bad, and we’ve all lost a ton of money in the last month.  I’m obviously a supporter of these causes, that’s why I’m on their lists in the first place.  But their overzealous pursuit of more, more, more donations leave a bad taste in my mouth.  The more they contact me and the more they ask for, the less likely I am to open my wallet in the future. 

Seth has a valid point.  If you’ve managed to procure a group of loyal followers, congratulations, well done.  Now figure out a way to engage those people and leverage their enthusiasm without taking advantage of their generosity.  Be cognizant of how often you’re connecting with them, and whether you could be perceived as a nuisance.  You’ve done so much to get these people to have a favorable (versus a negative or even neutral) opinion of your organization, group, or personal cause.  Don’t ruin it by biting the hand that feeds you.

Book Review: Don’t Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College

Thanks to my pal, Lindsey Pollak, for introducing me to author and blogger Dustin Wax.  I’m a longtime reader of Dustin’s articles on Lifehack, and I was excited to hear that Dustin has penned a new book for college students called Don’t Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College.

 

Dustin’s timing couldn’t be better, that’s for sure.  The members of the largest single year cohort in American history, those born in the year 1989, are currently college sophomores.  They face more competition for grades and other achievements than us Gen X-ers ever did.  And while there are a lot of advice books for grads, not too many people are addressing the concerns of those who are still struggling to get through school. 

 

The best thing about Dustin’s book is that it teaches skills that you’ll need for a lifetime, whether you decide to pursue graduate study or not.  He offers great tips for staying organized, taking short notes that trigger the memorable aspects of what was said, reading a book and actually understanding it, and using the Internet to streamline research appropriately.   

 

Dustin also provides seldom-heard guidance like “don’t throw papers away until the grades are in” and “avoid the freshman fifteen by sleeping an extra hour and saving 900 calories a day,” and “get your professor’s attention by using unconventional sources like surveys in your papers.”  I love the section on how to dissect a multiple choice question and come out with the right answer.  I was always terrible at these and think Dustin’s book might just have upped by college GPA a point or two!

 

Don’t Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College is a great gift – or gentle parental nudge – for those who sailed through high school and are now feeling a little overwhelmed by the college grind, or for those who are just looking for that extra edge. 

Do You Practice Unselfish Observation?

When I was pregnant, I saw other pregnant women everywhere, and now that I have a baby, I see babies the same age everywhere.  I notice lots of details about these babies, including how well they move and verbalize in comparison to my son, and what brand of stroller their mommies push.  Before the prospect of a child became my reality, I never paid attention to such things because they weren’t important to me.

 

 

I don’t think I’m unique in this respect.  When out in the world, most people focus on the things that matter to them and ignore everything else.  We don’t consider the fact that it’s a competitive advantage to instead observe the world unselfishly.  It doesn’t occur to us to look carefully at what is important to other people, people who aren’t exactly like us. 

 

 

Yet if we do, we open ourselves up to a whole new realm of possibilities.  If we observe other people and can determine why they act the way they do, what they need to get through the day, and what they secretly wish for themselves and their families, we can better target our offerings and be more successful in selling our products and services. 

 

 

Even though my son is a long way from being in grade school, I’ve started watching these parents too.  Their situation might not pertain to me right now, but sometime in the near future I’m going to want to write more about moms and dads who balance an office full of work and a house full of kids.  Through unselfish observation, I’ll be able to be a bit more authentic about it.

30/20 Vision Radio Show: New Episode on Friendships

Just wanted to alert you all to a new episode of my radio show and podcast, 30/20 Vision.  The show features my fellow twenty-something authors Christine Hassler (20 Something Manifesto) and Lindsey Pollak (Getting From College to Career), and tomorrow at 3PM ET we will chat about friendships after college, including how you can best make new relationships and maintain old ones, and how to troubleshoot when a friendship hits a snag. Hope you'll join us live or listen to the replay!

Can You Speak “Acceptably?”

I’m not late to the game on this one, I swear.  It’s just that I’ve been waiting.  Watching to see what Sarah Palin will do next.  Ever since her disastrous turn with Katie Couric, I’ve been anticipating her next public speaking snafu.  Why did I think she would make one?  Quite simply, because she admitted she didn’t know too much about the office of Vice President.  This isn’t surprising, as she’s never been to Washington and only has experience governing a small state.  

 

Incredibly, though, Sarah Palin has done all right.  Since Katie, her campaign speeches, media interviews, and even her debate performance could even be called articulate.  I heard she rehearsed for days with speech coaches, and it paid off.  Though Sarah knew little about the issues she was called upon to discuss, she played on her natural strengths and delivered prepared messages in a way that made a good many people think that she was qualified to lead our country should something happen to John McCain.

 

Those of you who have been around a while know that Dale Carnegie is one of my heroes, and I’m fond of quoting Dale as saying that the person who can speak acceptably is considered to possess far greater ability that he actually has.  In modern day English, this means that if you look and act like you know what you’re talking about, people will think that you do regardless of the reality. 

 

This is particularly important for young professionals, because they often have to convince others of their point of view with a persuasive manner of speaking rather than documented expertise and success.  And make no mistake, it requires practice.  Sarah Palin has made the time.  Have you?

When You Should Work for Free – And When You Shouldn’t

As the economy has gotten worse, I’ve noticed an upswing in the number of people asking me to work for free.  I don’t think these organizations quite understand that I make my living writing and speaking, so when I do these things for no pay, I don’t eat.  They rationalize that they are paying me in exposure – meaning that more people will experience my work because of them, and therefore more people will click on my website and buy my books.  From where I’m sitting, though, in most cases the exposure isn’t worth the time.

 

 

I thought it might be helpful to you to provide a distinction between when I feel you should work for free – and when you shouldn’t. 

 

 

When You Should: If you’re trying to get experience in a new field so that you have something to put on your resume, then yes, you might have to take an internship or volunteer position for no pay.  Similarly, if you need to prove yourself in an extremely competitive field in which you’ve never worked professionally (like writing), you may need to, temporarily, put yourself out there free of charge.  You can also justify working for free if it allows you to support a cause that’s personally important to you.  Make sure, though, that your unpaid position doesn’t compromise your efforts to pay your bills.  The last thing any of us need is more debt. 

 

 

When You Shouldn’t:  If you’ve already established yourself in a field and have a reputation of doing good work for pay, then you shouldn’t get too caught up in this whole “pay for exposure” thing.  Not only does it diminish your credibility and undermine your professional expertise to accept these offers, but it hurts the people that make an often precarious living doing these tasks.  After all, if an organization can get a service for free, why pay for it? 

 

 

Unpaid work can lead to paid work, but only sometimes.  Evaluate your situation carefully before expending your work product and intellectual property on an organization that doesn’t value it enough to pay for it. 

Taking Responsibility for “The Bumps”

For about a year, I’ve been getting these odd little bumps on one of my legs.  At first I thought they must be a result of some illness, environmental toxin, or even pregnancy.  When they appear, they itch and hurt, and I’ve been known to complain profusely about them. 

 

Only lately has it occurred to me that perhaps something I’m doing is causing them.  I’ve thought that maybe I should replace my semi-dull razor with a better one, or change shaving creams.  Maybe I should shower immediately after swimming in the chlorine-treated pool, or wear jeans that are looser in the calf area. 

 

For some reason, it was more natural to think of the bumps as something that “just happened,” something I had no control over and would come back again and again whether I took any action or not.  For eleven months, it was easy to complain without taking responsibility.  And a lot of people are the same way about things that happen at work.  You didn’t get that promotion because your boss doesn’t know good work when he sees it.  You’re burned out because you get assigned all the complex, time-consuming projects.  You don’t accomplish anything of value because your company is mired in bureaucracy.

 

People like this are often given to job jumping, because they think the problem is everyone and everything else – not them.  But I advise that you’ll get ahead sooner rather than later if you own up to the things you’re doing to create your situation, and take immediate steps to change them. 

But I Want to Go Into Finance!

I just got this e-mail from a WCW reader:

 

“Dear Alexandra: When I was younger, my parents, who used to watch the old TV show Family Ties, used to call me Alex P. Keaton.  I’ve always had a knack for numbers.  I got my first savings account when I was in second grade, and I’ve been playing the stock market since I was in high school.  I’m a senior in college now, and it has always been my dream to work for one of the big banking firms.  But with the economy being the way it is, everyone is saying that’s a big mistake.  What should I do?”  - Eric, New Hampshire.

 

Here’s what I think, Eric.  If you have the analytical chops and know as a result of an internship or part-time job that you actually like the professional world of finance, then you should go for it.  While it’s true that banking firms are in the doghouse these days, they are still essential engines of our economy, and the industry will bounce bank.  Just recognize that it might be more difficult for you to get an entry-level position than in years past.  A lot of firms have currently put the brakes on mass recruiting and hiring until things settle down, so instead of just showing up to an on-campus interview in a freshly-laundered suit, you will have to hustle like those who want to break into other competitive industries, like entertainment and publishing.  For example, do you have older friends who are working in finance now?  Shoot them an e-mail to see how they’re weathering the current crisis.  Re-establish those bonds now, so that when it comes time for your job search, you’ll have some solid leads. 

 

Most people who have their dream jobs have had to contend with their fair share of naysayers.  Do in your heart what you feel is best, for no single career path comes with a lifetime warrantee.   For the time being at least, the finance industry needs gifted young professionals like you to right the wrongs of the last few years. 

7 Tips for Better Presentations

If you talk to me about the speaking arm of my career for more than five minutes, you’ll get an earful about my Powerpoint quandary.  What’s the most impactful way to deliver a speech?  Should I use slides or not?  If I don’t, should I use talking points?  How can I be entertaining while teaching, without giving in to glitz and hype?  Seth Godin, who markets himself better than anyone I know, has some tips I’ll be keeping in mind for my upcoming talks.  Among them:

 

 

Don't use Powerpoint at all.  Most of the time, it's not necessary. It's underkill. Powerpoint distracts you from what you really need to do - look people in the eye, tell a story.  Do it in your own words, without artifice and with clarity. There are times Powerpoint is helpful, but choose them carefully.

Use your own font.  Go visit Smashing Magazine and buy a font from one of their sponsors or get one of the free ones they offer. Have your tech guy teach you how to install it and then use it instead of the basic fonts built in to your computer.  This is like dressing better or having a nicer business card. It's subtle, but it works.

Tell the truth.  Be extremely direct in why you are here, what you're going to sell.  It might be an idea, or a budget, but it's still selling. If, at the end, I don't know what you're selling, you've failed.

Pay by the word.  Here's the deal: You should have to put $5 into the coffee fund for every single word on the wordiest slide in your deck. 400 words costs $2000.  If that were true, would you use fewer words?  Words belong in memos. Powerpoint is for ideas. If you have bullets, please, please, please only use one word in each bullet. Two if you have to.

Check to make sure you brought your big idea with you.  It's not worth doing a presentation for a small idea, or for a budget, or to give a quarterly update. That's what memos are for. Presentations involve putting on a show, standing up and performing. So, what's your big idea? Is it big enough?

Too breathtaking to take notes.  If people are liveblogging, twittering or writing down what you're saying, is your presentation everything it could be?   After all, you could have saved everyone the trouble and just blogged it/note-taken it for them, right?  We've been trained since youth to replace paying attention with taking notes.  That's a shame.  Your actions should demand attention.  People don't take notes when they go to the opera.

Short!  Do you really need an hour for the presentation?  Twenty minutes?  Most of the time, the right answer is, "ten."  Ten minutes of breathtaking big ideas with big pictures and big type and few words and scary thoughts and startling insights.  And then, and then, spend the rest of your time just talking. Interacting.  Answering questions.  Leading a discussion.

 

 

This post was the most useful thing I read this week.  If you speak publicly in any forum, I hope you agree.